Danielle Jagoda, MA, LMFT
Keep your partner sexually interested
What are some tips to keep your partner sexually interested? Some of you women out there may wonder what do I do, I’m frustrated. My partner doesn’t seem really interested in sex or he isn’t really able to perform unless for role playing, unless I’m talking dirty, unless I’m being kind of that super slutty girl that he might see on TV or he may watch on porn sites. And, you know, you’re feeling a little objectified. What do you do about keeping your partner sexually interested in you?
Well, you talk to you partner about it. It’s really important that you feel safe and you feel comfortable in the bedroom with your partner and that you’re not doing things just for the sake of doing them to make him happy and, you know, that you’re comfortable and you feel like this is something you want to do and not just to keep your partner sexually interested. And it may be something you want to do from time to time, but it’s not every time that you want to necessarily want to role play or act slutty or dirty. So this is something to talk about with your partner and tell him how it makes you feel and ask him if it’s okay that from time to time you’re going to be you and he’s going to be him and it’s not going to be about role playing while having sex. It’s going to be about making love where you want to connect, and you want to be yourself, and you want it to be passionate.
If it seems to have become a problem where your partner can only perform if it’s more of you doing something taboo or something different, then maybe this is where you need to go to counseling or go to therapy or he needs to go on his own to kind of figure out what’s going on for him that he is not able to perform or get aroused without pornography or really dirty sex talk. And that’s, you know, when you really definitely want to seek a professional opinion and get some assistance.
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