Danielle Jagoda, MA, LMFT
Irritated and annoyed
Pick your biggest pet peeves and talk with them in a non judgmental way. Don’t bombard your partner about everything they do that drives you crazy.
How can I stop feeling irritated and annoyed at my spouse? Sometimes I have couples coming in and I have the wife complaining, he doesn’t put down the toilet seat, he walks around, you know, stinking up the bathroom, he doesn’t make the bed, he leaves his dishes in the sink, he leaves a mess, he acts like a child, he’s, coughing all the time, he’s germy, he’s this, he’s that. And they say, should I tell him all these things that are bothering me? I mean, I really — I’m really just so annoyed him.
And I really encourage you not to bombard your partner with every single thing that is annoying you about them. I encourage you to choose your battles and choose them wisely and to really think and prioritize. Okay, what is the item or issue that is most concerning for me? What is the most problematic issue? And to start from there and maybe choose one or two things that you want to work on with him that month or the next month. Because behaviors are hard to change once they’ve become a pattern or a habit. So I say choose your battles and choose one or two things.
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