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Danielle Jagoda, MA, LMFT

Complaining to others about your relationship

Often one partner may be dissatisfied something going on in the relationship and it’s normal for us to turn to our friends, family members, to kind of talk about the thing that are going on in our relationship that are upsetting us or bothering us. People wonder, what’s the harm in complaining to others about your relationship?

I really want people to be careful about doing this because when you go to your friends or your family and you are kind of unloading on them the things that you’re dissatisfied with in the relationship, they may hold on to those items longer than you do.  And you may work out those things with your spouse and be fine the next day and those are the things that they carry with them and so they have more of the negative information about your spouse and it may be very hard for them to warm up to your partner.

And, for these reasons I really encourage you to maybe talk to a therapist about it or just confide in one friend not take it to a bunch of different friends to get various viewpoints and opinions.  Just have that one confidant that you talk to but make sure that you also include the positive qualities and attributes that your spouse has so that they, you know, they kind of see both sides and whole picture.

By Twoology

Copyright – 2013-14 – Tunomi Unlimited Incorporated (Twoology)

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